I’m probably not the first person to observe that taking the red pill is a gradual process, and that the loss of illusions, like any other loss, initiates a grieving process.
But it’s worth pointing out that psychology’s general “five stages” model of the grieving process applies to TRP.
Denial: “Women aren’t like that! They’re people just like everyone else! Treat them all as individuals, and you’re sure to find the right one!”
Anger: “WTF! Bitches are all like this! They have no honour, no loyalty, and they don’t really love anyone but themselves! Fucking cunts!”
Bargaining: “If I work real hard and learn all the pickup moves, then at least I’ll get laid.”
Depression: “Getting laid by shallow, obnoxious women has become dull and unrewarding. And there’s no sense looking for a unicorn. Maybe I’ll just be MGTOW for a while.”
Acceptance: “Women aren’t bad. My expectations of them, and theirs of me, were based on faulty premises. They are creatures of instinct, just like I am… but of different instincts. If I learn what those instincts are, and teach them about mine, we can develop realistic expectations of each other and get along just fine.”
If we really want to understand what gets written here, in its proper context, we need to understand that most “Red Pill Theory” posts will belong to one of these five stages. Each stage has value, because to reach a later one, you must go through the earlier ones. And, as in grieving, the progress through is seldom linear, smooth, uniform, and one-directional.
But to understand each post in context, it helps to mentally decide which stage it belongs to, and read it with that in mind.
This is why concern trolling and tone policing have no place here. Not because extremism is our banner (we have no banner, we are not a crusade), but because venting, discussing and understanding anger is a legitimate part of phase 2. Saying that women aren’t worth hanging about with, even for sex, is part of phase 4.
If I were to say “don’t be so angry” to someone who comes here to say “all women are bitches and whores”, then I would be interrupting his process of coming to terms with the loss of his illusions. It would be far better for me to tell him that his feelings are important (because feels actually sometimes are important), and that his anger is not bottomless, and that it will eventually run dry.
So when I read a text post here, some red pill theory, some rant, I just say to myself “stage 2”. Or “stage 3”. Or “stage 5”. And then I continue reading. Because they are all useful. Even if I am (mostly) over my own anger, understanding other men’s anger helps me, because it teaches me more about where the disconnect between reality and our expectations occurs.
But to anyone who doesn’t understand that TRP posts come from different stages of the process… well, a lot of what’s written here just isn’t going to make sense.